


the last page

by Avriel



Category: Natsume Yuujinchou | Natsume's Book of Friends
Genre: Angst, Friendship, Gen, Heavy Angst, Loyalty, Minor Character Death, One Shot, Suicidal Thoughts, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-12
Updated: 2019-11-12
Packaged: 2021-01-29 14:04:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21411391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Avriel/pseuds/Avriel
Summary: "I'll protect you".Everyone only wanted to protect the ones most important to them.Funny, how this single thought led to such a tragedy.
Relationships: Madara "Nyanko-sensei" & Natsume Takashi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 38





	the last page

**Author's Note:**

> My first work in this fandom! I really don't know where this came from...
> 
> I'm so sorry, Natsume!!
> 
> Well, please enjoy!

"Sensei, Natori - san was crying."

Natsume whispered, beside him. As if telling a secret.

"He was."

Why he still cared for that damned exorcist, after all that he put them through was beyond him.

Because he was human?

Was that it?

"Touko - san and Shigeru - san, did they make it ?"

The kid's voice wavered but he still tried to appear strong. As if not to get his hopes up.

"They did", he said. Leaning against Natsume's battered body.

The priest's brat and the girl that weren't so lucky, went unmentioned.

Natsume stared at his friends lying around the town- no... battlefield with glassy eyes.

Although the blood of Ayakashi was only visible to his eyes, he was sure that anyone looking at this town would only see it as it was.

Human or not.

Natsume reached out for the Book of Friends and caressed it, slowly.

As if he was mourning for the friends he lost.

Like the book was a thing to be treasured so much, and not a weapon capable of mass destruction.

He'd thought Natsume was going to rip it off, to be honest.

That was the only way to a normal life anymore.

With how these pages caused him to lose everything, he wouldn't have stopped him.

Not really.

He felt stupid to even think that.

Forget being selfish, the kid was too kind to even hate his enemies.

Human or Ayakashi.

That was why Matoba's blood felt so satisfying under his tongue.

"I was... way in over my head, wasn't I. sensei."

Natsume spoke up. A bit unexpectedly.

"Thinking that I could help anyone... while being so weak."

"Thinking that I could protect anyone... less myself..."

Sobs wrecked his body as tears piled up.

"I am so.."

"So...."

But those words never came out. Just tears and unshed regret.

sorry.

Humans were such foolish creatures, he couldn't help thinking.

Weak.

And leading such fleeting lives that were just not worth protecting.

To Ayakashi at least. But yet...

'But, you did help.'

He wanted to say but didn't.

He wouldn't understand.

All those Ayakashi, powerful yokai, gods- coming together to save a... human.

It was...

Impossible.

Natsume was impossible.

He just never noticed before because he was always so close to him.

Because after all, he was just a stupid kid.

Reiko's grandson.

What else was there to see?

He finally saw him for the impossibility that he was. What the yokai who died for him saw.

What he represented, for them.

So he said nothing.

In the end, a human couldn't possibly understand the depths of an Ayakashi's feelings.

What it meant to give up immortality for a human.

The exorcists were demolished, along with most of their allies.

At least, they'll never recover, he made sure of that.

He didn't toil on the consequences.

Powerful Ayakashi he'd known for hundreds of years.

Gone.

Weak as they were, that Matoba brat put one hell of a fight.

So much so that even regular humans got involved.

In what would soon be considered a natural disaster.

Laughing to his death.

He looked at Natsume. The human child he had once helped out on a whim.

He, who could've taken the book anytime but hadn't.

It was the first time he ever consider that he couldn't protect somebody.

Too weak to even protect a human.

He looked at his pathetic self. His hind leg missing and one eye that just wouldn't open.

Now that the book was out in the open,

could he, no... could anyone protect him?

A trivial human life time suddenly seemed too long for him.

Too long to challenge the world and stay on top.

For a human, at least.

He eyed Natsume almost kindly.

As much as someone like him could.

Why make him suffer so much?

That soft boy who had none of Reiko's rough edges.

He knew that if he reached out to Natsume now, he would never wake up.

A soft tug was all it would take. For a human child.

It was only when Natsume spelled out the exact thing that he was considering that he realized, how utterly weak it was.

"Sensei, please kill me."

How weak he was.

Natsume looked at him determined like he was sure that he'd understand.

That his request was not at all random.

His eyes widened as he stared at him, speechless.

So you did understand.

He chuckled.

"Idiot"

As if he could do that.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
